After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
Eric and I got kicked off of karaoke last night. Apparently, singing about masturbation to the tune of "A Whole New World" is not appropriate and definitely frowned upon by the DJ.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
Randomize
