I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
If the Four Horseman of the Apocalypse gang banged each other and had a kid, it would look like the creature I woke up next to this morning.
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
I need moral support for this bender
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
Randomize
