Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
Randomize
