you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
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