Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
What part of "waking up in the crawl space of my house with a raccoon" sounds like a good night to you?
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
we tried to pick out bridesmaid dresses with pockets so we could sneak flasks in with us. what the fuck is the point of a dry wedding?
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
