Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
Seriously. If I'd known all it took was a 29 year old UPS guy to make me feel THIS SEXY, I'd have been fucking them for 30 years.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
I know you would never do it--but if I ever walk into your house and find a "live love laugh" ANYTHING, I will commit you to an asylum. If it is a vinyl decal adhered to the wall, I will just smother you myself.
Randomize
