If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
Randomize