we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
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