Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
I love millennial parents. One of the moms at the daycare center literally told me she and her husband named two of her kids after batman characters and one after game of thrones
Randomize
