Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
Just saw a man being put through a dui test on the side of the road... it was noon and he was on a bicycle. God bless texas.
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
Randomize