We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
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