Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize
