So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
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