Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
Literally the only reason we didnt get arrested was because the cop said I reminded him of Steve Stifler from American Pie
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
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