If I don't come home tonight, I've died in a pile of gay.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
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