Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
I discovered last night there is no graceful way to remove your face from your gf's crotch when your parents walk in the room
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
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