I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
So apparently I’m into choking now
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
Randomize
