(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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