I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
I don't remember because I was drunk out of my mind, but I have it on good authority that weed cinnamon buns at 3 in the morning with chocolate milk are better than sex.
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
Some old chick is rubbing my thigh and saying she needs some Memorial Day dick. Her teeth are kind of gross but I'm going for it.
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
Randomize