You made me cry and you don't even care
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
it's like that moment that you're driving and realize you're lost except instead of driving i'm just sitting here in my living room drunk, eating a plate of sausages, drinking red wine and just thinking "i'm going to be 28 this year. i know people who are married, with beautiful and well behaved children. where was the wrong turn?"
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Randomize
