This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
Randomize
