the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
I feel like that japanese guy who ate all the hotdogs. Except replace hotdogs with sailor jerrys. And instead of a trophy and world record I just get a hangover at work
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
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