big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
Randomize
