If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
How drunk are you?
Completed.
Randomize