Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
I looked at my own cervix.
You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
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