I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
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