pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
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