just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
Randomize
