he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
Randomize