You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
I didn't notice because vodka
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
So my flight takes off at 8am. Does this mean I need to break my airport bar pre-flight ritual?
Aren't you the one who taught me that airports are the judgement-free drinking zone?
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
Randomize
