HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
Thanks for ditching me last night. I got a ride home from the Dominos delivery guy. You owe me 3 large pizzas.
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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