Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
I bought a police grade breathalyzer on ebay at 4:37 am. At least I'm a responsible drunk.
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
Found the puke drawer
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
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