how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
Randomize
