is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
I've taken a shot every five minutes for the past twenty. His valentines cupcakes are going to be a fucking delicious vodka induced mess. Thinking about putting vodka in this next batch. I'm the best girlfriend.
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
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