Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
Randomize