Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
I drank like a thousand beers last night and my poo is solid, not gross like usual. I think this means I've grown up.
i just renamed my vag "the sorting hat"
you mean i was at the winter classic?
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
Posting happy birthday to my grandpa on Facebook.... Then realizing my profile pic is me dressed as a slutty cop when he used to be a police officer.
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize