I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
I feel like the only phrases I can clearly speak while drunk consist of: i'm fucking drunk, chug, and shots
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
I’m gonna stop you right there. The last time you had a “brilliant” idea, I woke up to my kitchen covered in flour and a javelin through my tv.
Randomize
