when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
i just realized that the oil change sticker on my windshield is a day before the last time i had sex. I've driven exactly 10500 miles since.
you need to get laid.. and an oil change.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
They left me at home... I'm a liability
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
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