She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
I'm gonna fight the coyote
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
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