That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
Randomize
