you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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