My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
My dad just said "fuck circus"
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
Randomize