i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
Your shirt... Was in my pants
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
