just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
Randomize
