normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
But he was wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom. It was like a glowing rod of kryptonite. I can't resist that, kryptonite is my weakness.
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
I always knew I would be boring and die in an Uber.
Randomize