I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
The cops high fived after they tackled you
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
Randomize
