We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
Dude he downed 9 shots of tequila, sang bohemian rhapsody with 3 randoms Wayne's world style, solo'd closing time, chased the hot bartender's dog all the way to main, tackled him, carried him back, hot bar tender hugged AND kissed him, then he does a jumping heel click and leaps into my car through the window. Next rounds free at the yeti. Needless to say your little brother is a tequila god.
Basically.
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
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