i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
No I am not eating basil off your cock
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
Apparently I've told this bouncer I stalk him on Instagram 3 times. I should stop drinking. I only remeber saying it tonight. early sign of Alzheimer's
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
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