just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
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