the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
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